UNODC Press Conference Turns Into Percussion Ensemble After Press Question Hits Too Hard

What was supposed to be a gracious press briefing showcasing the diplomatic skills of the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC) ended up being a masterclass in deflection through desk banging by representatives. The chaos began when a representative of the media asked a clear, pointed question, one that, hideously, forced the committee to stand up for themselves. The hall went silent for a nanosecond too long, fear visibly creeping onto the faces of delegates like some well-rehearsed wave of incompetence. And then, in perfect harmony, they did what any uncomfortable, unprepared committee does when faced with accountability:

They started table tapping. Yes, UNODC representatives refused to answer, deny, or even delay with classic filler like "That's a very interesting question…" Instead, they resorted to panicky, rhythmically truncated table knocks in hopes the sound would strangle both the question and their inability to answer. Witnesses referred to the process as "a desperate jazz session," and one press delegate stated, "I was not sure whether they were evading the question or summoning rain." The press corps remained unimpressed.

Not a single delegate was able to muster a coherent response. A few tried to smile. Most just stared at their placards as if they would magically become a cheat sheet. The skit ended not with thunderous applause but with a gentle, collective epiphany: UNODC had been publicly sidetracked and then tried to tap dance its way out of it. If silence is deafening, today UNODC showed that mortifying tapping is loud.

Hugh Jass

CNN